I've noticed people have started to questions their lives recently, lost in that post college graduate haze of nothingness. I admit I have often cast my thoughts to this vapidness of the mid 20's, its hard to avoid. That was until this monday.
I work at the airport of this fair town and catch the privately owned ainliner bus. To set the scene I had just got off a 11 hour bus ride from east coast city which is very different to Canberra (i.e. M-Town is beacon of white light amongst a world of grey). Standing at the bus stop @ 7am, feeling a not unsual combination of coming down, hungover, tired and some deep vein thrombosis forming deep in my thighs, i wasn't on top of my game at this stage of the day.
As the bus pulled up, I walked towards the door to start the slow ascent to the horror that is work, when suddenly this couple walked out in front of me. These kids would have been in their late 20's and by the looks of it had been married a while. I don't normally pay too much attention to the ppl around me as it hurts to think without a stimulant in the morning, but this was somehow different. My eyes were drawn to them like a junkie to a needle. Why? I was at a loss. I didn't want to look, but the compulsion was too much.
Then it clicked. I was staring gratuitously at their matching luggage set. The suitcases had a floral pattern (pansy's I think) on pink and green material, probably the most hideous thing I have ever seen. I slowly tore my eyes from the luggage and looked up towards the man's eyes. There was nothing. This man was living and breathing, but dead. He didn't have a life, he had an existence. You could see these ppl just floated from one vantage point to another, always seeking what they can't have. They had travelled the world by tourist bus in between paying off their morgage and planning for kids the world did not need....or want
Looking into his eyes I finally understood the meaning in my life. My purpose is to live my life for people like them, the walking dead. All the drinking, fighting, fucking wasn't for me, it was ALL for them. Everything I did from now on was just for them, the people that couldnt anymore, the lost generation. I realised if I really wanted to help ppl it was time to step it up a notch. To just live life off the vibe, live life like it was the end times (isn't it?), everything else is just one more step to an existence.
I just hope I make them those fuckers proud.
Now where did I put that bottle of whiskey....?
